Groups for wives of gay and bisexual men were found to be an effective therapeutic intervention for the problems that arise when a husband makes a disclosure to his wife that he is interested in pursuing homosexual relationships. The groups helped wives resolve the issues of the marriage and to make positive changes in their lives. Most users should sign in with their email address. If you originally registered with a username please use that to sign in. Oxford University Press is a department of the University of Oxford. It furthers the University's objective of excellence in research, scholarship, and education by publishing worldwide. Sign In or Create an Account. Sign In.
I’m gay, married, and not leaving my church | Joel Hollier
Author information: 1 Adelphi University, Marion A. Twenty-one heterosexual women who were or had been married to bisexual or homosexual men and had children by them responded to a page questionnaire that explored their experiences as wives and mothers. All of the married women expected a lasting, monogamous marriage. Only three had partial knowledge of their husband's sexual orientation before marriage. All of them went through a painful grief reaction when they learned that their husbands had emotional or sexual, or both, attachments to other men. The suffering was aggravated by feeling deceived or stupid for not having guessed the truth.
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A mixed-orientation marriage is a marriage between partners of differing sexual orientations. The people involved in such a marriage may not be romantically or sexually compatible, for example if the marriage is between a heterosexual male and a homosexual female. The marriage of an asexual to a sexual is one in which the asexual partner either does not experience sexual desire or attraction, or experiences low desire or attraction. For the asexual partner, the word "compromise" is used by the Asexual Visibility and Education Network AVEN community to label the act of consenting to have sex with their partner for their partner's benefit.
As archaic as it might sound, even with all the media hype, touting celebratory strides forward for LGBTQ rights, there's still a dirty little societal secret getting brushed under the rug Now, before you glass house dwellers start throwing your vicious verbal and judgmental assaults, I invite you to swear on a stack of Bible's that you've stood in a gay man's shoes, pummeled emotionally and intellectually by family, church, and society's pressure to be the heterosexual marrying kind. Yes, stand in his shoes and make sure they fit perfectly like Cinderella's glass slipper, before you open your condescending, wicked stepsister, sneering mouth. If you haven't lived and breathed sexual orientation confusion, felt gay shame, or laid awake at night wishing that you really could pray the gay away, then honestly, you've nothing to contribute to this discussion and everything to learn from reading further as to why some gay men take the road of heterosexual matrimony instead of embracing the truth of who they are -- gay men! Quite honestly, all the inside scoop that I'm about to dispense into your grey matter, if you choose to open your minds to a reality check, can be found in my recently released book -- Frankly My Dear I'm Gay: A Late Bloomers Guide To Coming Out. Yet again, for those of you who believe you know better than those of us who've lived the journey, just taking my word for it would fan the flames of my world against yours. Instead, I've decided to not only share excerpts from my book about the journey, but to first, provide personal experiences from a sampling of fellow travelers who chose to say "I do" for all the wrong reasons.